Remember that old Papa Roach song where the guy yells “My weakness is that I care too much!” Well that wasn’t really his weakness. His weakness was that he was a whiny stalker who couldn’t sing and cried too often.
Still, there is a powerful lesson in this song.
From time to time we all find ourselves lacking in basic dating, and living, essentials. For example, in most US cities a car is a basic requirement for citizenship. Those without one quickly become societal outcasts, left forever to hitch rides or tack on a few extra hours to any trip via a decaying and underfunded mass transit system. To some of the more superficial women, a lack of job, place to sleep, or discernable skills will likely count against you. Some might say you probably have bigger things to worry about if you don’t have a home, but they are sorely mistaken. Love transcends not only present living conditions but also whatever bleak future we may face in life, including the grim realization of an inevitable death.
So maybe you lack some basic necessity, or many of them, no big deal. There are many great excuses out there on which to blame your deficiencies, a few might even make you more attractive.
Say you don’t have a car. There are plenty of logical, perfectly reasonable explanations for your lack of wheels. Maybe you got 3 DUIs in one week, or maybe you jumped it off an awesome ramp and into a fruit stand, bursting everything into flames. Maybe it transformed into a giant robot or maybe it got automobile AIDS. Who knows? For women none of these reasons will do, to them you’re just a guy with no ride and a stupid goatee.
This is where you must get creative. I’m generally against lying to women, I prefer the term “transmutating the truth.” Get used to the term because you will use it a lot.
Truth transmutation is perfectly justifiable. If women were a bit less superficial they would look beyond your unemployment/ homelessness/ lack of car/lack of personality/ listlessness/ pungent odor/ etc and see the vagabond with a heart of gold within. Unfortunately they are not, and you must operate within this framework of impossibly high expectations, pretty much forcing you to make up a few details (which of course lead to making up more substantial details and so on).
When she inevitably confronts you about your mountain of lies, blame her. Remind her that if she wasn’t into all that superficial crap she wouldn’t have been interested in you in the first place, the selfish floozy.
For more info about buses and bikes and life without cars check out my pal Aisha‘s blog, Ecostreets.
